P90X – Bring it!

Tiffany,

In the straight world, it’s acceptable for men to be out of shape, sports-watching, beer-bellied tools. We even make furniture for these lazy bastards. Have you seen the sofas that have cup holders and built in remote controls? Many of them even recline. Are we so lazy that we have to have special cup holders in our furniture? Apparently, the answer is yes.

In the gay universe, the picture of what a man should look like is often very different. Sure, we do have the ‘bear’ community is that is all about excessive body hair and leather, but then there are the rest of us. Most magazines that cater to gay men are full of advertisements featuring some smooth half-naked man with washboard abs and a butt you could bounce a quarter off of. This doesn’t upset me. Images of men with firm athletic bodies are the norm in our culture. Rush Limbaugh need not apply.

The point is that society sends mixed messages as to what we should look like. As a result, many of us have had to deal with body image issues. For me, it started at a young age. I was always the puny little kid in school who was asked to play ‘skins’ during a game of dodge ball with those hard red rubber balls. I was always picked last on every team challenge in PE class. I had the grace and speed of a turtle and very little strength to boot. I was the kid that got hit by the baseball because I was too afraid to get out of the way. On a good day, I kept the bench warm for the other players.

But now, all these years later, it’s my turn. I have just completed my first round of P90X and have started my second. I am the fucking alpha dog now and nothing is going to stop me! No red rubber balls, no playground bullies – nothing. I can punch and kick like it’s nobody’s business. I can even show a Yogi a thing or two with my moves. So, while the bullies of yesteryear are drinking and eating fatty foods while they sit on their sofas complete with cup holders and built-in remote, I am now in the best shape I have ever been in. I’m takin’ back the power and it feels really good.

I will be blogging periodically on my P90X progress. If you are also on the program – especially if you were a geeky gay kid, let’s work together to ensure our success. And Tiffany, I know you’ve been wanting to try the program, so now is your chance!

Bring it!